What should the trio on the Miami Heat be nickname...

This just in! The unofficial remix to Lebron James’ “Rise” commercial!

“What should I do? Should I admit I overestimated the hell out of Chris Bosh? Should I tell you that D. Wade and I have great chemistry in the shower but not so much on the court? Should I ask David Stern to start giving out championships in July during my television specials?”

Obviously, this is an exaggeration, but would you put it past Lebron to be thinking something like this right now?

The Miami Heat, who have been drooled over by ESPN and just about most of the country (hate them or love them, you’ve been waiting) since they formed their “supertrio” in June, have gotten off to kind of a rocky start this season. At 5 wins and 4 losses, they have definitely underachieved thus far. Any thoughts of them breaking the 1995-96 Chicago Bulls record of 72 wins and 10 losses have been thrown out the window, providing extra proof (though not needed) that Jeff Van Gundy is the most retarded NBA analyst ever with Bill Walton coming in at a close second.

           

What might be the cause of this poor start, you ask? Well, the number one reason is that they don’t have anyone that can handle their business offensively or defensively in the post when faced with a tough matchup. Sure, if you put Chris Bosh against someone smaller or skinnier than he is, he might go to work on him and put some big numbers up. However, when you put a Kevin Garnett or a Paul Millsap on him, he is pretty much going to disappear, as evidenced in the last couple of games. His defense is not that good, and it’s obvious that anyone who takes a physical game to Bosh is going to take him out of his game completely. This is probably why he is putting up numbers that are lower than Taj Gibson’s right now. The future backup PF for the Bulls is averaging 15 ppg and 6.3 rpg as opposed to Bosh’s 14.8 ppg and 6 rpg. I’m not taking anything away from Taj Gibson, but do you think the Heat might be wondering why the hell they are paying Chris Bosh superstar money when there is a second round pick who’s only in his second season playing better than him right now?

             

You are going to get your numbers from Lebron and Wade on most occasions, but they are having a lot of trouble putting it all together. Last night, Wade was garbage, Lebron almost got a triple-double but managed to shoot a crucial 3-pointer off the side of the backboard in crunch time, and Bosh was his usual soft self. If you are going to blow out the bad teams but lose to the good ones, you’re going to have a hell of a time taking out your first round opponent in the playoffs, and an even tougher time not getting swept in the second round.

          

I know people are going to say I’m hating and that they haven’t found their chemistry yet. But guess what, the Big Three of the Boston Celtics were beating the brains out of teams from the start of their tenure, and not one of those players has ever been compared to Michael Jordan. We all heard these guys say they were doing it because they wanted to win, but guess what, they all want to be “The Guy” too. Chris Bosh is an exception because he seems to be comfortable playing the sidekick’s sidekick, but they don’t even know who the first sidekick is yet. People claim Lebron is the sidekick, and Lebron might embrace that publicly, but Lebron sure as hell does not play like a sidekick.

           

The bottom line is, if you put three prima donnas on the same team, you are going to get three people trying to get their own shine. While they might want to win, they don’t know how to do that without being the major reason the team wins. If they can find that chemistry, they will be better, but you only have so many touches you can give to each player. The Miami Heat will turn it around and be pretty damn good by season’s end, but they will not make it past a team with a good front line in the playoffs, they simply have no answer for that.

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